Wednesday Funnies :-)

Jay Leno: Germany has offered to send troops to the Lebanon border. I bet Israel’s breathing a sigh of relief there. Nothing makes Jewish people feel safer and more secure than the German Army marching on their border. ... NBC anchor Brian Williams interviewed President Bush. He asked him about his poll numbers and President Bush said, ‘The key for me is to keep expectations low.’ I think you can accurately say, “Mission Accomplished.” ... [Last week was] the one-year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina hitting New Orleans. FEMA officials said it seems like just yesterday when they first arrived in New Orleans. And then they realized, “Oh, it was just yesterday.” ... President Bush toured several neighborhoods [in New Orleans]. It was still mostly empty. They had Dick Cheney coming along to shoot any looters. ... At the 2006 MTV Video Music Awards, former Vice President Al Gore lectured the audience about global warming. The Rock ‘n’ Roll audience cheered, gave him a standing ovation, and then they got in their stretch limos, went to the airport, got in their private jets, and flew home to Malibu. ... A new article in Newsweek is out talking about what it’s like to be an atheist. I actually have a friend that’s an atheist, and married to a Jehovah Witness. Their kids are a little strange. They go out and knock on doors but don’t know why.