Rush Limbaugh's Morning Update: Graveyard

Well, folks, we're in the closing days of the longest -- and arguably most contested -- presidential race in our history. And, by accident or by design, this year's "October Surprise" is a financial meltdown of the world economy.

But American newspapers are in their own meltdown. Weekday readership, according to the Audit Bureau of Circulations, dropped an average of almost five percent since April. Sunday readership is off even more than weekdays. The Atlanta Urinal and Constipation suffered a 14 percent drop-off. The New York Times -- house organ, Democrat Party -- is still losing readers everyday. The LA Times has announced more layoffs, as they seem to do every month.

Many Drive-Bys have responded to hard times by raising their rates, further eroding their circulation -- just like their fellow liberal travelers in government, who insist on raising taxes despite the severe consequences.

Predictably, the Drive-Bys continue to misdiagnose their problem. This week, their industry experts are blaming shrinking news pages, the economic downturn... everything but the real reason for their decline, which is simple to understand: The customers just don't trust them anymore. They know they are not getting objective news. All people have to do is turn on the New Media -- listen to the radio -- to find out the news these papers refuse to print for purely ideological reasons.

So, we're sorry Drive-Bys; no tears for your continued fall from grace. You're digging your own graves -- and, frankly, there are a lot of us here happy to help throw the dirt on you. Heh-heh!

Read the Background Material on the Morning Update...
• AP: Newspapers see sharp circulation drop of 4.6 percent